In life, venturing outside of societal norms can often subject us to the fears and criticisms of others. As someone who chooses to live unconventionally with my family, I have faced this firsthand. It’s incredible how deeply other people's fears for us can influence our interactions, even to the point of losing friendships.
When I was pregnant with my fourth child, I experienced this struggle profoundly. A close friend, who practiced Chinese medicine, offered to end my pregnancy during a time when I was very ill and vulnerable. Despite her intentions, I repeatedly expressed my readiness to keep the baby. Ultimately, I chose to prioritize my own values and kept my son, a decision that led to the end of our friendship. I can't imagine my life without him now. Each of my children is a gift, filling my days with immeasurable joy.
Through this, I’ve learned a crucial lesson: be wary of other people’s fears for you. Their inability to see themselves in your shoes can lead them to project their anxieties onto your life choices. However, it's essential to make your own informed decisions, irrespective of how unconventional they may seem to others. Running a large family isn’t without its challenges, but it’s entirely possible and fulfilling. You simply do it.
Traveling with children is another area where outside fears often intrude. Yes, there are moments of stress and chaos. But by observing and learning from these experiences, I’ve become better prepared each time. Mistakes are natural, and they turn into opportunities for growth, both for myself and my children.
The key is to find supportive people who respect your decisions and who can listen with empathy rather than judgement. Recognize others’ criticisms as reflections of their fears, not yours. If someone attempts to bring you down, tell them, “I understand you are fearful for me, but I am a strong, confident woman, and I am embracing my choices. Please support me, or hit the road.”
Remember, don’t let others’ fears dictate your life. They might not believe in what you’re doing because they wouldn’t dare to try it themselves. Live boldly, with confidence, and always stay true to your path.
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